This is very common with doctors uneducated about thal. The doctor I had with my first son was so focused on keeping the iron down he tried to prolong transfusion intervals and my son rarely stayed above 9. Before I even my son was born I knew what I would be dealing with so I interviewed doctors in the area to see if they would work with our specialist. Although he said he would...he never took her advice.
This Same doctor would tell me I was torturing my son by not putting a port in him and told me that if he had cancer a port would be necessary. I was shocked that he even made such a reference but I definitely second guessed myself for a bit. I mean, he's a educated doctor right? I should trust every decision he makes?!
But, as Andy said they r not the specialist. In this case U will probably know more about thal than they even care to know. It's difficult to break through but sometimes WE need to educate them, and stand up for our children. I finally got fed up with my doctor after he refused to let the nurse who we were most comfortable with access a line in him. He knew that we absolutely hated the iv team at the outpatient unit and he apparently wanted to teach us a lesson for being 20 minutes late to our appointment! I was devastated that someone could punish a child like that. I also found out from our favorite nurse that he was aggravated that I wouldn't listen to him about the port! ,
I spoke to another doctor in the practice and threatened to find another hospital if they could not accommodate our wishes and correspond with our specialist. Luckily my new doctor is awesome and frequently works with our specialists, researches thal and Even looks to me for information so he can assist his other patients who are not as knowledgeable.
Sometimes, it really takes time. The key is to stand by your decisions and if u r unsure reach out to someone on the board. That was and still is the key to our sanity.
Good luck..
I agree, many docs are stubborn. When I was months old, the first doc I used to go at was also a stubborn lady, didn't found my veins easily, disallowed my parents to keep a watch at me (I think) and also told that I won't live past a few years. After going a time or two there with futile efforts, my parents in rage took me out of there from half a transfusion and we never went back there.
I now have awesome set of friendly-family doctor. Also my physician listens to me a lot and he's a very calm person and not unlike other stubborn weirdos out there.
I'm sure you shall find a good set of doctors if now now, sometime later; it may take some time. Meanwhile, try to take visits at other hospital and see how doctors are there, what are their views about thalassemia and if your son can get a better treatment there than the current hospital, etc.
Best,
-P.