Hi Neale,
You have problems that have solutions. Remember that. Speaking as a father of 5 kids, I will be frank with you. You have a child and that child has to come before you. For that to be possible, you have to find the strength within you to do all that is needed to turn your health around. You can get a lot of support here and find people to lean on, but you have to do your part. You need to contact Dr Porter immediately and make an appointment for a full evaluation, that includes liver and heart scans to determine your iron load. Please be aware that treatment has evolved so much, that blood disorders can be well managed as long as the patient is in a good treatment program and complies with that treatment.
Neale, if you really wanted to give up, you wouldn't have sought us out. Realize that and use it for strength, because something inside you gave you enough strength to look for help. I know a whole lot about how iron loading is treated and especially about the nutritional side of treatment, and I can advise you just as I advise many others. Those who listen and follow what they need to do, turn their lives around. But first, you need to get on a regular program and fully comply with your treatment. This can be managed as long as you are under an informed doctor, and few are as informed as Porter. Understand that you are in excellent hands as long as you are being seen regularly, and understand that you have to do your part.
The founder of this group gave up because she could not tolerate desferal, but today we have three chelators available, so there is no longer any reason to just give up. As a parent, I will tell you that you have much to live for, and I will also say that I have seen much worse cases turn around once the determination to do the necessary work was found. There is no reason to be thinking about saying goodbye to your daughter. Talk to Dr Porter about your concerns and fears, I am certain he will tell you the same thing. The tools are there to turn your health around, but you have to do what is needed.
If you are on Facebook, I would like for you to join one of the groups I am involved with running. There is a Facebook thalpal and also a closed thalassemia support group. I would be happy to add you if you wish. The reason I'd like you to join is because there are so many people your age in these groups and I think it would be really good for you to see how others manage their disorders. You will find many people who have had similar thoughts and have learned how to deal with them and how to get their lives back on track. Even if you are a silent member, you will still find much benefit.
You haven't told me anything that makes me think you are beyond help, but I feel that it is very important to attack your iron load now. Do not hesitate.