Emby,
i understand sis .. but there are a lot of reasons behind all that ,, the reasons i dont want to mention here bcoze i dont want to be a reason of some else's dicouragement , demoarlisation and give up ..... all i want to say to everyone is that ,, life is beautful and a presicous gift of ALMIGHTY ALLAH so take good care of your self it the best way to be thankful to ALLAH for this presious gift .... once you lived the moment , you cant rewind/relive that ,, you cant edit that so try to live every moment of your life and dont be careless about your health ...
future is never been my book of thoughts ... in past 5-7 years , at every stage i always tried my levels best and left the rest on my destiny, and never ever thought about the result or future ... thats the reason i never been worried about the results n future .... but sometimes your past comes in your way and strucks you realy hard ...
anyways ,, , i m still a happy man and satisfied to my life and condition ,, bcoze i believe that if u want to live a happy life then you must be thankful to ALLAH in every condition ... thats my strength from day one uptill now .....
(sorry for bad communication skills ..
.. . )