Thalassemia and emotions

But no matter what - I think she needs to know that she is "normal".  We believe she is normal.  There are a multitude of health conditions and she just happens to have one that requires a bit more discipline. 

It is a wonderful attitude,it will definitely help your daughter grow up in a confident person,wishing you all the luck .

Zaini.

super attitude ocwoodmanp ,
Wish you all the best of luck ...

Zaini Sis ,
you wat , yesterday i went for TX , there i was discussing to thals center's doc , that thalassemia isn't a dis-ability or illness , i said that it is only a deficiency of red blood cells whic you may see in many people  and many other defficiencies ,, like iron, vitamin, or mineral defficiances, i was saying that " as other deficiencies , if we treat it properly main our Hg and iron level in normal range then its nothing like a probleme "  i was saying that convince patients abt it i was convincing her to tall the patients about it so they may live a better life ,  then sudenly one of us she said " but our societes won't to accept this reality , " then sudenly a phrase came in my mind, and i said to her as wel that you people have to take this thought out to thals mind ,  it was [bgcolor=#ffff00]" haye bechara , esko tou blood lagta hai [/bgcolor] " people love to say this phrase bcoze they want to show their sympathies but they dont know that they kill's their courage , khair , it doesn't matter in my case who and wat ever peoples are saying  ... for those who take it on their heart n minds , we have to vanish the impacts/effects of that phrase to their mind ...
hey zaini sis, please translate that highlighted line into english ,,....

Best Regards
Take Care
Umair

Yes Umair,

You are right,sympathy might be a good emotion,but i hate it when people use it where it's not needed,like when the know you are a thal and whisper among themselves "Poor thing,he has to transfuse blood every few weeks,whole his life "  ,they don't understand that their muttering isn't going to help that person,a smile would be helpful though.

I think i translated your sentence . 

Zaini.

Thanx Zaini Sis ,
you translated right ,thanx for the favour ... 

Writing into this post feels like I am awakening a dormant volcano...well firstly because the post has been hibernating for a while and secondly because I doubt if I let my emotions completely surface ever before...
Moms are primarily the care takers of children as a naturally taken for granted thing I guess... and men are the procurers of things needed...like the food in the cave men times and now money!Of course women work too now, but the child bearing and rearing still is with them...
So being a mom is a lot more than one knows at the start....the cute commercials fail to show all those things!They only show the cooing babies and the pink and blue baby objects and lovely cribs etc etc... They forget to highlight (of course on purpose) the huge responsibility having kids is! And this includes all kids...irrespective of their thal status!
But truly thal does evoke many emotions other than usual too....It begins with the realisation at diagnosis, then guilt,anger,acceptance,then facing it all...coping with it alone and as a family, facing the world as and when it comes...,the financial aspect, loneliness, bad days wrt levels of various  and plus other issues not related to thal as well!
Men and women (as umpteen people have written and earned money!) have different ways of dealing with issues and also how one has been brought up makes a difference to it all too...then how one is placed financially too matters...
What one must understand or be reminded in the 'bad day' phases is that everyone has problems-even those without thal....or without a thal family member...
Probably what hurts the most is that sometimes people fail to understand this(as someone had already mentioned in another post)aspect of having problems like the others plus thal....
And sometimes it is difficult to find the support or reaction one expects from family members-immediate or otherwise and that may be interpreted wrongly...for all those who think that dads dont contribute much towards the management, I think so too...but I guess they dont know otherwise...men are like that and have been like that...acknowledgement and appreciation is definitely something they can do and I guess women arent asking for much!
I do respect and appreciate the courage of ocwoodmanp...I dont know how I would have dealt with it myself...You sure have abundant love within your hearts and surely are angels from heaven! God bless you!
As I was reading all the posts, I was thinking about writing so much, but I feel that I will lose myself in the words...so the rest for another time.....
And yeah I would definitely like to add one thing about this site...what is the best part is that we are all more than a family because sometimes even in a family one is ashamed or embarrased or plain uncomfortable to be completely honest about ones emotions and problems!
Take care all....
Madhavi