From my limited expierence with non thal people who take anti-depressants, i observed that they do no good. Either they continue with their depression or continue being dependent on these medication with all their side effects.
Depression is usually a symptom of a ''problem'' one suffers or can not deal with. Usually i can see that both doctors and patients tend to concentrate more on dealing with the ''symptom'' rather than the ''problem''. I am not generalising here because i know that sometimes depression is a result of imbalance in some chemicals of the brain and in this case medication is a must.
From my point of view i believe that depression in thal teens should be addressed with behavioral therapy teaching them how to cope and face challenges rather than medication or at least limited usage of medication. We don't need to end up with teens depenant on anti-depressants.
As parents of children, i believe that our target is to work on preventing depression in the first place rather than how to deal with it. I know that it is not that easy and we have many challenges and i know too that such situations have many sides to deal with but i am speaking about a target that each parent must work hard to reach because we are AWARE and that what makes all the difference.
I believe that the way we raise our children and our ability to ''neutralize'' their life with thalassemia is the way out. And this does not start at the age of adolesence, but rather earlier in childhood.
I do believe so much from my expierence with my children, that parents can ''brain wash'' their children with whatever ideas, believes, style of living at an early age. The important part here is the timing or when to start before it is too late. Any thing in the world has two sides, the good and the bad and the good side of thal is how to make it part of a child life rather than a problem in his life.
Maybe i sound too optimistic since i am not in the shoe of a parent dealing with thal teen but at least this is how i think is the way out. This will put a lot of stress on parents because they will be always searching and making sure everything is going well and above all ''wearing the face of everything is going well with a big smile''. I know how hard this will be cause many parents are already having many intervals of anxiety and depression themselves because many times in our lives while dealing with thal, we end up waiting for the unknown or problems keep pumping up every now.
I am not sure if i have discussed this before or not, but more than a year ago my son had ''depression'' , i am sure that children have their depression too. He was rejecting being obliged to take his supplements or to be poked with needles for his monthly check ups ... he simply hated the routine.
At that time i actually reacted very coldly (which is usually not common for me in such situations) and i simply told him okay don't take any thing anymore and actually i did for a couple of days. The third day i started talking with him about the concept of ''consequence'' in general. I told him that the quality of one's life is a consequence of one's doing. I gave him million of examples that he can grasp like consequence of studing, eating ,lieing, behaving ....things he can understand and that their is always bad and good consequence and he has to choose and be responsible for the bad/good consequence.
Then it pumped in my mind later to get a scarf and wrap it aound his eyes for an hour (i started it like a game) he kept falling and hitting everything around him in his own room ( he had a lot of bruises that day ) and at the end i just told him in simple words (after expermenting in a practicle way) which is better monthly FOREVER pokes or dealing with the inability to see. He laughed and laughed and told me '' no i prefer needles, i love them
'' From this day, we have no problem about the needles any more. I know it is not the end of it and with days other things will appear again
My son does not understand the word thal yet, but he knows one fact.. that his body is different than his sister and he needs different things than his sister needs. I am raising him on the concept of ''difference'' rather than the concept of the ''disease''.I stopped telling sympathysing words to him when he gets hurt once from the needle or when any of his medications taste bad because sometimes our words or looks for our children makes them feel ''sorry'' for themselves.
Now i would rather tell him how to deal with a bad taste (by closing his nose for example) and that we will not spend our day nagging and complaining from a bad taste cause we have alot of other activities to do in life and we would not be smart staying all day talking about a ''taste''
Now i would tell him when he is sometimes get hurt from a needle, that this is a normal thing and it could happen and the pain is temporary and is nothing compared to the pain he has when his knees get wounded while playing football.
I just don't want to make him feel sorry for himself or see this look in my eyes
Too long post
, but i know this subject will not end because as life goes on we will all face different situations in this so sensitive area
take care
manal