Manojmass-
i think its up to the parent to make a constructive decision..whether the child grows up later and likes it or not..but i think just the shear strength of the parent and also their confidence in the desicion they made , is going to show the child that the parents were confident..and that will mean alot. (no matter if the child decides to go by his/her own decisions later)..
with the topic of telling people..he/she will grow up and decide on their own personal beliefs about it..
but..if you want my personal opinion..i think it is good to tell people (relatives, friends ect.)..cuz if it is held back..the child will most definetly feel that inner tension coming from the parent..and that in itself will not be good at all..nor for parent or child. and i think if the disease is shown in a casual light by the parents than, (hopefully) in turn the people who communicate with the child will be able to talk to him/her about it more openely and freely. basically i think if the parent shows from the start they are comfortable talking about the disease, the child will grow to be comfortable talking about it as well.. cuz it is never good to hold anything in. especially something that might be bothering you. not to say that the parents are bothered by the illness, just the apprehension of the child being judged. but like i said, i think if the parent talks about it with confidence and a easy-going attitude, the child will be effected in a good way. i think if its talked about it will give a better understanding of the kind of people you are dealing with too..if someone gets uncomfortable or shocked or scared or worried or judges, then those are all reflections to think about and say "wow, thats great that i atleast now know this person a little better" and then maybe one can reflect on themselves afterwards in understanding more of what they want from themselves and the world.
my personal story is that my parents didnt really talk about it with anyone (or i dont think)..not my relatives, not their friends, not even me ..so..i kinda grew up holding most of the stuff in, cuz i thought my parents were always sad about it and i didnt wanna hurt them more..but mostly..i really didnt understand what was going on , and i wanted too..but really sometimes i was too afraid to even ask cuz i didnt know what effect that would have on them. they never really had "a talk" with me about it or anything. i'm not trying to show my parents in a bad light..they were amazing, treated me with so much love. when your a kid though, this stuff happens..if you think something bad is happening to your parents you wanna protect them. and my way was i guess not talking about my fears for fear of hurting them. in the end, it just makes things more uncomfortable for everyone..for the kid, the parents, even the people who dont know... cuz then, everyone will feel the tension in that person when they are dealing with them.
so yeah..sorry about the personal details..i know you didnt ask for it, but i thought it might 'take you into the brain of an older person with thal' ...hahah
but dont worry..from the sounds of you , you sound like a parent who will learn anything with open arms in order to make your kid understand happiness .. with or without the thal..
so i think your fine..
much
and
to you!