Thalassemia and Depression

Hi ya all,
the topic is thals n depression ... now i m feeling depressed bcoze one of my friend told me to post my opinion in this thread after reading al this thread, and i m depressed bcoze i even didn't read even completly, And'ys first post under this topic ... . so , i m a thal and this is the  reason of my depresssion aahahhahahahha    ..... Just kidding ... i think i m still that cheeky as much i was a litttle ago ...

Umair  there is nothing to laugh about about depression there are many people out there suffering with depression some even kill themself as a result of this illness.
Try to refrain yourself from being sarcastic you disappoint me your behaviour is not funny on this occassion.
As I observed ,I feel that, we human-being has a tendency to think we are better that others
  and we think that if a person is facing a problem they are a low life ,Little that we all know that if we live long enough we might have the time when we have to face similar issues.
I dont and didnt ask or need sympathy,I knew what I was doing when I typed my message,I am not ashame of my illness
There are no perfection in life ,good things or bad things do happen to good people
I am gratefull I am loved by my sons ,sisters ,brothers and some close good friends and most of all I know who I am I love myself and I'm here,I know my strength and my short comings. I thank god for being me
Kathy

Hi Kathy ,
sorry if i hurt you ...  i didn't meant to hurt you or to say that i lived a depression free life or i lived superior life than anyone else or to express sarcasm .. sorry if my last post hurt's u .. i have edited that post ...
you know Kathy , when i was new on this forum , since then you're one the person those are inspiration for me , bcoze you're thal and struggled enough in life , that's why you are an inspiration for me , you're one of the thalpal who changed my way of thinking.. you are thal and in ur 50s that was the reason i inspired though later i got to know u r not thal maj , but at the right time ur profile gave me strength , at the time i needed ans looking for the info like this .... ..
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Hi ya ALL
yeah , i know i m not the same umair , i was.. i m changed , really much changed, and i observed these changes in myself .... i also been depressed on many ocassions in my life... and i shared those  moments here on thalpal  too .. . the time i had knee aches , stomach aches ( many times ) , then malaria , then crampy leg bcoze of wrong prick for desfeal  and lots of other moments too , i sahred a few of those moments here and many are still un-shared ... i dont think that i lived a better life than others , as you all know that i suffered to the condition u people cant  think  of that ( like wheelchair era , and osteprosis and diabetes and stomach ulcers , iron overload and symptoms of congestive hheart failure )  .. the only differnce in u and me is i always treat myself like " dont cry for the thngs u cant change , try ur best and leave the results on GOD " this is why i m satisfied to my life i have lived and gonna live ... i m not better than you people, i m  not living a super normal life but thanx GOD i m still alive. .. Thanx GOD i have a pair of hands and foots and have everything normal , i thanx to GOD for the things HE blessed me with and will not cry for the single thing HE took away to me .. its Blessing of my GOD that HE took sumthinng away to me to always keep me reminding that m nothing , and i cant do anything on my own efforts and i always need blessings of HIM.. that's the way i think, that is the way i cope with my depressions n my problemes ... i have been through the extreme conditions  ,  but i never been on anti-depresent medicine ... depression is the game of mind , be strong at mind , and b satisfied to your life , dont look at the thing u wanted but u didn't get , look at the things u got ... 

try onething , start counting the blessings , and when u complete that list then contact me, and tell me isn't that list is longer than the list of things u dont have ?? .. count each and everything of His blessings , i bet u cant  write the complete list of His blessings ... that's the way i think, that's the way i satisfy myself and my mind ... that's why i m satisfied to the life i have lived ... and for future , i have no plan for my futuer ... i m living and trying my best to get all the best of life  and i have leave/left the results on GOD , so i m not worried anymore abt my future , bcoze my future isn't my probleme ...
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i hope my this post will not hurt anyone ... i haven't red all the replies .. replies are too long to read , it seems like you people are takinng reveange to me in the same shape i took your time ( by sending long relpies to your posts ) ....

Best Regards
Take Care
Umair

Come on Umair,

you don't have to apologise for anything -- we all know you mean well.

Lena.

Thanx Lena  , for understanding my point of view

Best Regards
Umair

Thank you everyone for your very informative responses to my question.  Raising a young thal, I am realizing that with proper treatment thals can accomplish anything they want to.  I also realize that they will face challenges from time to time. 

In dealing with these challenges, dealing with pain and discomfort and the time that is required in dealing with the disease they may have some ups and downs.  Especially in the adolescent years when thals become more aware of their blood disorder and its implications on their lives - they may face some anxiety and some may have to overcome depression. 

As Zaini, Manal and some of the others have said - the way we raise them will definitely help them deal with any fears, sadness or anxiety that they may have.  Sometimes, the time committed to thal can put thals behind in other aspects of their lives and this can lead too stress.  Because lil A is 11 years old now, I know that I need to find new ways to help him deal with stress and any feelings which he may have due to thalassemia.  I definitely think that learning to look at the positive side of every situation is going to serve him well.  In whatever way that he can, I need to let him take charge of his own life and happiness so that he does not fall into self pitty and helplessness.  While he was sick he was down and he felt a lot of anxiety.  We had several talks about attitude and finding the silver lining and I think that it did him some good.  Also, whenever his little sister is down - I let him talk to her about why she shouldn't let things get her down.  He did a very good job of helping her.  Since then he has been his normal self again.  I will post his comments later, they were quite profound. 

I learn so much from all of you every day.  I also learn a lot from adult thals - Lena I am glad to know that if we let our kids know that we are there for them and if we give them strength that they will come around.  Also, Umair I am happy to learn how your sense of humor and your faith in god have helped you deal with the low points in your life.  It is unbelievable what you have endured - being in a wheel chair, having to lower your iron overload, facing heart failure, losing your best friend, diabetes, hepatitis - and yet you never hesitate to help others - you never stop laughing in order to make others smile.  I cannot believe that you are only 22 years old.  Hats off to you my nice friend, you are such a great inspiration to us all.   It is so important to keep encouraging each other - to build each other up and to not tear anyone down.  We are all in this together, trying our best. 

My son has a lot to learn from all of you - about thalassemia, about life in general, about emotional ups and downs - and how important it is to take control of your thoughts and feelings to live a better life. 

Thanks again guys 

Much love,

Sharmin

I will post his comments later, they were quite profound.

 


Please do Sharmin, will be waiting for them

manal

Glad to have helped, Sharmin.

 I have tried to put myself in my parents' shoes and think how they might have faced my thalassemia, their feelings, their attitude and their role. That's why I understand yours and Manal's and Zaini's and every parent's anxiety to make things right. It is really  of great importance to act normal, as a family does with every other kid and let your kid realise that thal is a status, a situation to be handled, not something "bad" or  "out of control".

Lena.

Depression is a bad thing to encounter whether one is thal or non thal or even thal minor...
Even if there maybe medical intervention for the same, I personally feel that it is eventually upto the person to gear up courage and whatever else that is required to come out of it...the medicines may of course help as also the support of loved ones...After all, like it is said, 'God helps those who help themselves'...
I think depression is like a small battle one may or may not have to wage war with...sometimes one is incorrectly or inadequately armed for it...and sometimes the ammunition just takes a while to arrive!So those who have waged it will know how to plan the attack-defence and offence for the next time!
Anyways, troubles are different when one deals with as others and their own!So one must try to understand that each individual has their own way of dealing with depression and it leaves its impact on them..I guess what is important is that it should be picked up and dealt with fast...
It is nice to know that there have been such parents so as to teach children how to live their lives well and learn to face all that comes alongwith it!
Maybe the best way to end this post here would be to reiterate that here at this site, we will always have friends to help us face whatever problems come along our way...
Madhavi

Umair I am happy to learn how your sense of humor and your faith in god have helped you deal with the low points in your life.  It is unbelievable what you have endured - being in a wheel chair, having to lower your iron overload, facing heart failure, losing your best friend, diabetes, hepatitis - and yet you never hesitate to help others - you never stop laughing in order to make others smile.  I cannot believe that you are only 22 years old.  Hats off to you my nice friend, you are such a great inspiration to us all.   

Couldn't agree more .

Lena

What a lovely picture, it is nice to see you dear

manal

Thanks for your kind words, Manal. I am sure we'll meet some day in Athens or in al Qahira.

Lena.

Lena , Sharmin n Zaini , thanx alot for your support , .. i m not upset of that , nothing can offend me easily and it was nothing to make me feel upset  or to make me feel offend .. its okiey , dont worry abt anything , i m absolutely fit n fine .... thanx for being there .. i wanted to login a day bfore yesterday ( on 29th of September)  , but unfortunately i didn't , ... then i planed to login yesterday ( on 30 september ) but that was my Tx day , when i reached back home after Tx Desferal drip was ON , and one of my hand was occupied with that drip , so i decided not to wrtie at that time , bcoze it was difficult for me to type with one hand , and that IV desfral ended a few hours ago after that i had to go for dinner then to sit a few hours with my uncles and grandma, so that's ithe reason why i m late to come and reply you people  .. b sure, i m not upset bcoze of someone's remark, and everything is normal on my side ..  be sure , i will not leave u people alone to enjoy on this forum , and i will not stop eating ur brains .. i m always here ...
and BTW , thanx for liking the way i eat ur brains hahahaha ...

( i dont know why i m hesitating to go for Tx since a long time, i didn't got the reason why i m behaving like that ... my recent Tx is after 20 days , and last tx was after 17-18 days , i  dont know why i m delaying my TXs too much , and again and again , its continuesly 4-5th time that i delayed my Tx and delayed for very long ,  my Hb was below 8.5 everytime since last 4-5 Txs  and this time it was 7.8 ... i still won't to go but my knees forced me to go , whenever i delayed my Tx that results in aching knees  , yeah my knees start aching o low Hb everytime .. and that's wat start happening again a few days ago ) ... yeah, i know my Hb is very much low and i need a few extra Txs ,  seriously low ...

Best regards
Take care
Umair

Come on Umair, I understand delay of your transfusion when there is a blood shortage but to delay your bt on your own, that's crazy. You harm yourself. Do not do that to yourself.

Lena.

Hi ya Lena ,
i think i was discussing things out of topic here , so , i posted reply under another thread plz, dont mind ( i hope u will not mind ) .. here is the link :
http://www.thalassemiapatientsandfriends.com/index.php?topic=2112.msg31146#msg31146

Thanx ya for reply,
Best Regards
Take Care
Umair